Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize