Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
