Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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