Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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