the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize