That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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