Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
