Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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