Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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