I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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