Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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