i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
