we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize
