Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
