Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Randomize
