i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
