We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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