also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Randomize
