no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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