I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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