So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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