it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
