i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize