apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
We need to rekindle our bromance
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
