Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
