How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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