Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize