wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
