you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
