Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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