i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I feel great
I just peed on a car
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
