I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
