Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
