He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
