38 yer olds are good kisserssss
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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