So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
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