Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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