is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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