who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
