I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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