why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
