Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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