Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
