The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
