toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
