I have demons in me.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.�
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
