if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Randomize