We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
