I'm going to jail i love you
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
