I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Randomize
