we're blogging at a bar
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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